America is increasingly degenerating into a military state. We are losing exporting industries to other countries and about the only thing we have left to export is war and weaponry. I was wandering around my local super-market this afternoon picking up the essentials: Red Bull and shampoo when I was devasted to discover that the military state had infiltrated my local psycho-market. The super-market is a side-show American oddity which reminds oneself of a genesis between the Barnum and Bailey Circus and a heavy psychedelic LSD trip. Its like a mini-Las Vegas in every town.
Anyway, I digress. I was saying how this hyper-nationalistic, military state-of-mind has polluted even the local King Soopers. (I want to get this typed out onto the world wide web before the 'black helicopters' sweep me away and sequester yours truly to a rat-hole somewhere in the Guantanamo Bay, Cuba U.S. military prision camp. I'm joking of course....or am I?)
Thus, there I was. Standing in the middle of an aisle which was assaulting my brain with shampoo choices when I heard the Star-Spangled Banner. Yep, there I was holding a 4-pak of Red Bull when I heard the American National Anthem. I didn't know what to do. I thought for a moment there that I should drop the Red Bull, cover my heart and sing along. Then I realized that I was in a grocery store shopping for Red Bull (legal, liquid crack) and shampoo and listening to the uber-sacred national anthem. Now don't get me wrong. I love my country and I love the Star-Spangled Banner but do we really need to be blarring it over the speakers in our grocery stores? Doesn't that cheapen this patriotic song? Wedging it in between the jazz set and the country one? It waters it down like melting ice mixing with Coca-Cola in your glass while watching the game. Let's save the national anthem for the Olympics and other serious events-not the frozen food section, huh.
Speaking of frozen foods. You gotta try that Breyers Mint Oreo ice cream. Damn skippy its good!!